Social Media and Vuvuzela Marketing

Going by the comments and emails I have got in the past few weeks, it seems that social media marketing is the new hype term on the internet. Heck, I was even a panelist in one such show.

So why would I contemplate biting the hand that seems to feed me?

Simple. I have serious doubts of  the ability of social media marketing bringing home the bacon.

I don’t like Kenyan politicians, but I could not ignore Anyang Nyongo when he talked about “siasa za vuvuzela” (vuvuzela politics). In simple terms, he meant that there were those of us more intent in creating a lot of noise with no substance.

Going by the hype on Social Media,  I tend to agree.

Last week some young men approached me and my friends as we were talking about a project we wish to start. They quickly tried to sell us a new business they wanted us to buy. You guessed it. They wanted to sell to us their social media marketing services.  Being one of these boring meetings, I was only too happy to let the young men tell us about their products.

It was a great product. They would get us sizeable twitter following for the new business, a number of facebook followers etc. Then I asked the question……

How much is a facebook follower worth to our business?

It’s the Brand Stupid

Oh, boy! Here we go again. Having a social media presence would apparently help in our branding.

Every time I hear some clown talk to me about branding, I always ask how much. Exactly how much is branding worth to me? I will get some story about how branding helps in perception, a loyal following etc.

That is where a pure SEO like me parts with social media.

I’m not interested in any marketing campaign that does not tell me the exact value of each client or lead. I mean in actual dollar terms.

Social Media is Weak in Metrics

Saying social media is weak in measuring success is the understatement of the year.  What is the value of the facebook fan who only visits once and never comes back to your page? How much is the value of the twitter follower who has never opened his twitter account? All these friends on Myspace, do they ever talk about you?

I know I know. Some Social Media guru will tell me something about social media metrics and some lovely graphs.

I’m not interested in graphs, I want numbers.

I need numbers that the SEO guy will give me.  I need to know

1. how many visitors I got in a day,
2. where the visitors came from,
3. how long they stayed on a particular page,
4. what did they buy,
5. how much was what they bought?

Statistics that matter!

From the SEO I am able to know how much each sale cost me. From the social media wizard, all I have are 1000 friends who I have no interest in.

Social Media Wastes my Bandwidth

Hosting my website costs me money. I also have very little time for these friends and pokers who only last 30 seconds on my site.

In the African culture, having visitors is a very good thing. That is until the visitors start going to your fridge to drink that yogurt that you took a whole week to make. I love my grand father, but this is one piece of wisdom I have no interest in following.

The SEO is only interested in visitors who translate to leads or buyers.

There, I have said it. I would rather you stop reading this rant and instead go to the contact page and leave your number there.

Buyers bring money to my family. Visitors from social media sites use my bandwidth for no particular reason. In fact, too many lady friends on facebook may cause havoc in my family. Like my rich uncle once told me,

I don’t need friends, I need sales!

SEO is the Past, Present and Future of Internet Marketing

I know Google and especially Matt Cutts think that SEO are one step away from the devil. But truth be told, SEO markting brings business to your business. Even Michael Gray thinks that Google profiles SEOs.

The truth is that even the self proclaimed social media gurus have no idea how this thing works. One day twitter is the best thing since sliced bread, the next facebook is King. I prefer living in the world of real numbers not 1000 friends.

I doubt if social media, Google wave or even Google Instant Search will kill SEO.

As long as human beings seek the best solutions to their problems, search engine optimisation will be king and social media will remain vuvuzela marketing.

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